It started as soon as I got to work this morning. Yes, yes, I know I said I was going to be getting another job, but what with the economic downturn that the world has faced lately, I figured its best that I wait until after the new year and then attack the situation head on.
Obviously my issue is work-related. It certainly isn't anything at home. I actually mentioned last night to fuckdoll that its such a good feeling to be able to sit at home or in a cafe, and know that there isn't a single secret that I keep from her. Its something that in previous years, I would have had to deal with on a 24/7 basis.
The reason for that happening then was that I had to lead a second, secret life in order to get all the desires I had fulfilled (not just sexual ones). But the obvious flipside to that happening was that I had to spend all the rest of my time working out way to afford the time and money involved in running my alter ego.
Its so good now that I have everything that I need at home with my fuckdoll. Its certainly causing me to be a lot more relaxed about life.
So, back on track, what is it that I am so frustrated about? Well, there's only two things I can think of.
Firstly, I'm frustrated with myself that I've been employed by this company for 20% of my life, and I've got precisely nowhere.
Secondly, I'm frustrated with the company that I've been employed by it for 20% of my life, and I've got precisely nowhere.
Its just something that, unfortunately I inflict on you readers until I get myself into a job that doesn't feel like work all the fucking time.
Or at least somewhere that doesn't make me want to cut my wrists just to escape the downtrodden level of pondscum that I am here.
Mood status - zero. A neutral mood cos I'm in work. Ask me when I'm not here and the number will go up. When I'm here, the shitty factor brings me crashing back down to zero.
Arse.
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